Once again I am faced with the difficulty of TIME...that is the worst four letter word I know, for those who don't know me well I am very impatient! This year has been a hurry up and wait and it is starting to get old..but I know it is for the best.
I am finally in a point where I can think about being happy. It has made my faith in God huge. He has placed the right people in my path at just the right time that it leaves me no room to question what he wants it is just the TIME I am having an issue with! I just dealt with the closure of the divorce a few weeks ago and that was difficult. Now is the fear of the unknown. How do I stand on my own two feet? Make my own choices and know that if I screw up and I in it alone. Of course we have friends and we have family but we don't have that bond! Nothing that says or feels like you are not in this alone, some say time will heal that..but I hate that answer!
I am trying to figure out how to go out and communicate as a "single" person. That feels strange. Talking to men is now flipped from what it use to be, you could flirt but it was not flirting because you are married. Now if I flirt I better be ready....it comes back and now what do you do?
I have many great people in my life...kids, family, friends both old and new. The new people are starting feel like home...starting to feel comfortable like I could see keeping them in my life forever! The sound of their voices and seeing their name on my phone makes me smile! In a selfish way it is because they are MY friends not "our" friends. If those newbies out there are patient then my wings will spread even wider and it will be worth the wait. Everything is just so new....but TIME will fix that to! I just have to hurry up and wait!
No comments:
Post a Comment